Have you ever noticed how quickly women apologize for what’s on their plate?
Someone brings out a tray of cookies, and suddenly it turns into a confession booth:
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“I probably shouldn’t…”
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“Don’t judge me, I haven’t eaten much today.”
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“I know this isn’t the best choice…”
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“I’ll get back on track tomorrow.”
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“I’m being bad.”
Meanwhile… nobody asked.
Nobody was waiting for an explanation.
Nobody was taking notes.
Yet the apology rolls out automatically, like we’re trying to get ahead of some invisible jury.
It happens at family dinners, at work, out with friends, at holiday gatherings, even when you’re alone and talking to yourself in your own kitchen.
And the thing is, it almost never has anything to do with the food.
It’s more like this little social habit we’ve picked up, the same way we say “sorry” when someone bumps into us.
Half the time, the apology isn’t even connected to what we want.
It’s connected to what we think we’re supposed to want.
The “I’m trying to be good” script.
The “I should pick something healthier” script.
The “people are watching what I eat” script.
The “I need to justify this” script.
None of us consciously chose these lines; we just absorbed them over the years, and now they come flying out of our mouths before we even taste the food.
And here’s the thing:
when someone does eat a cookie without announcing a TED Talk about it, nobody reacts.
No gasps.
No raised eyebrows.
No moral collapse of society.
Just a person… eating a cookie.
What if the apology isn’t actually about the food at all?
What if it’s just an old reflex, like your brain pulling up a file it doesn’t need anymore?
Food doesn’t need an explanation.
You don’t need to justify hunger, preferences, cravings, convenience, comfort, or the fact that something looks good.
Sometimes a meal is simply a meal.
Sometimes a treat is simply a treat.
And sometimes you’re just eating because… you’re eating.
The next time you hear that apology trying to slip out, even just in your head, you might pause for a second and ask:
“Do I actually feel bad…
or did I just say this because I’ve always said it?”
You might be surprised how often it’s the second one.
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